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To Boddah:
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Chainy Untamed Beast


Posts: 9152 Fuji Bucks™: 5345 Reputation: 286 
 | Subject: To Boddah: Sun May 30, 2010 5:04 am | |
| Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpleton who obviously would rather be an emasculated, infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand.
All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my first introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independence and the embracement of your community had proven to be very true. I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along with reading and writing for too many years now. I feel guilty beyond words about these things.
For example, when we're backstage and the lights go out and the manic roar of the crowds begin, it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the love and adoration from the crowd which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is, I can't fool you, any one of you. It simply isn't fair to you or me. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I'm having 100% fun.
Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do, God, believe me I do, but it's not enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. It must be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they're gone. I'm too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasms I once had as a child.
On our last 3 tours, I've had a much better appreciation for all the people I've known personally, and as fans of our music, but I still can't get over the frustration, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There's good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad. The sad little, sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don't you just enjoy it? I don't know!
I have a goddess of a wife who sweats ambition and empathy and a daughter who reminds me too much of what I used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every person she meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that terrifies me to the point to where I can barely function. I can't stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I've become.
I have it good, very good, and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy. Only because I love and feel sorry for people too much, I guess.
Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for your letters and concern during the past years. I'm too much of an erratic, moody baby! I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out than to fade away.
Peace, love, empathy,
Kurt Cobain |
|  | | JesterDon IVVVI Secretly Sinister


Posts: 4007 Age: 19 Fuji Bucks™: 5395 Reputation: 188 
 | Subject: Re: To Boddah: Sun May 30, 2010 9:57 pm | |
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|  | | Guest Guest

 | Subject: Re: To Boddah: Sun May 30, 2010 10:01 pm | |
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|  | | Chainy Untamed Beast


Posts: 9152 Fuji Bucks™: 5345 Reputation: 286 
 | |  | | Chainy Untamed Beast


Posts: 9152 Fuji Bucks™: 5345 Reputation: 286 
 | Subject: Re: To Boddah: Wed Mar 09, 2011 5:31 pm | |
| | Niels wrote: | Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpleton who obviously would rather be an emasculated, infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand.
All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my first introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independence and the embracement of your community had proven to be very true. I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along with reading and writing for too many years now. I feel guilty beyond words about these things.
For example, when we're backstage and the lights go out and the manic roar of the crowds begin, it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the love and adoration from the crowd which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is, I can't fool you, any one of you. It simply isn't fair to you or me. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I'm having 100% fun.
Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do, God, believe me I do, but it's not enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. It must be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they're gone. I'm too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasms I once had as a child.
On our last 3 tours, I've had a much better appreciation for all the people I've known personally, and as fans of our music, but I still can't get over the frustration, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There's good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fucking sad. The sad little, sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don't you just enjoy it? I don't know!
I have a goddess of a wife who sweats ambition and empathy and a daughter who reminds me too much of what I used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every person she meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that terrifies me to the point to where I can barely function. I can't stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I've become.
I have it good, very good, and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy. Only because I love and feel sorry for people too much, I guess.
Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for your letters and concern during the past years. I'm too much of an erratic, moody baby! I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out than to fade away.
Peace, love, empathy,
Kurt Cobain |
Amen.
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|  | | Yes Im Am Co-Administrator


Posts: 14764 Age: 16 Fuji Bucks™: 18715 Reputation: 364 
 | Subject: Re: To Boddah: Wed Mar 09, 2011 8:48 pm | |
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|  | | Victoria Marine Glory


Staff Message: they really shouldn't make these edit-able.
You're right. Except you can edit it only because you're in the GFX designers group.
HERP DERP
STAWP IT
NAW. Posts: 2885 Age: 17 Fuji Bucks™: 4265 Reputation: 185 
 | Subject: Re: To Boddah: Wed Mar 09, 2011 9:22 pm | |
| If I liked reading I wouldn't be failing English. |
|  | | Derderder AdminstraDER

Staff Message: Still immature as fuck... Posts: 1437 Age: 17 Fuji Bucks™: 2523 Reputation: 75 
 | Subject: Re: To Boddah: Wed Mar 09, 2011 9:26 pm | |
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|  | | Chainy Untamed Beast


Posts: 9152 Fuji Bucks™: 5345 Reputation: 286 
 | Subject: Re: To Boddah: Thu Mar 10, 2011 4:45 pm | |
| | Victoria wrote: | | If I liked reading I wouldn't be failing English. |
A little bit respect, please. This is Kurt Cobain's suicide letter. |
|  | | Einsteinean Untamed Beast


Staff Message: Edit this. I dare you. Posts: 2243 Age: 89 Fuji Bucks™: 6913 Reputation: 45 
 | Subject: Re: To Boddah: Thu Mar 10, 2011 5:23 pm | |
| | Victoria wrote: | | If I liked reading I wouldn't be failing English. |
Have some decency and realize just what this is, ok?  950 posts to go. |
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